12 Stages of Personal Power - Part 1 (of 3) - How we avoid power?

In the 12 Stages of Healing we explore different aspects of human consciousness, which gives us insights into what we think and feel, and how we behave and respond to situations. Depending on our default responses, we may have a healthy, rewarding life or a life of struggle to name but two.

How we stay in our personal power seems to be a hot topic currently. There is so much negative press and polarisation out there, we are constantly told what to think, how to respond and what to believe in the media, that it can take us away from ourselves.

So I was called to explore the 12 stages in terms of my own journey and how I relate to personal power and responsibility for self, and this is part of the end result I want to share with you.

I’ve split this into three seasons - Discover, Transform and Awaken (for those of you familiar with Network Spinal Analysis and the work of Donny Epstein).

In Discover we work out how we avoid things, how we move away from pain and discomfort.

In Transform we take action. We are in our power and will do whatever it takes to grow and make progress.

In Awaken, we know that we have a bigger purpose than merely our own life and we explore how we serve and contribute and awaken to the higher vibrational emotions

Stage 1: I am powerless, nothing works, I’m doomed, there is nothing to be done. I am so helpless. I have no power at all.

In stage 1, we disconnect. It can be hard to stay present with your body, your mind races, you are everywhere but deep inside because it is either numb or just too much to bear.

Stage 2: He has taken my power. She is so much more powerful than me. If only this would change, then I could be in my power. I can’t do anything unless xyz change. It’s her fault. I blame my mother.

In Stage 2 we have more resources but we are looking for a solution to our powerlessness outside of ourselves. Or someone or something to blame. We still cannot go deep inside and own our power. This stage is fed by the media, and we are often sold “magic pills” that will make everything ok, only to find that even if we get temporary relief, nothing really changes.

Stage 3: I’ve been here before. Why do I always feel like I make progress and then hit a brick wall. I’m doing so much and I’m still not feeling empowered. I feel so stuck.

I find when this stage shows up that it’s easy to drop back into stage 1 or 2. It’s common for people who have done a lot of work on themselves, looked at their health challenges from many different perspectives to feel pain in this stage. What I remind you to do is if you feel this to remember, you are going deeper. You are only revisiting this stage from a deeper, more aware perspective each time you get here. As you move through different stages you learn so much about yourself. Most of us have wounds that cannot be totally fixed and transformed in one go. Each time I visit stage 3 I remember what I have already learnt and achieved and I know this is a doorway to progress.